LONG LOVE, SHORT LIFE

CHAPTER 15

NEW CAMBODIA RISES, OLD LOVE FALLS

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Part 1

Dara had long thought that globalization will bring prosperity to his wife Duongchan as well as to all Cambodians but instead it brings more troubles than prosperity. A new Cambodia on old land has emerged. The least developing country of Cambodia was admitted to the World Trade Organization (WTO) in 2004. Such global integration of trade contributed to bring lots of good and bad things to Cambodia. The hell and heaven came to this small country which sits between Thailand and Vietnam. New Cambodia shaped the love knot between Dara and his wife Duongchan.

By now, Dara had turned 37. His wife Duongchan is 35.

Sweet love from the old days is now broken in the new Cambodia. Dara never thought that the knot of love he built with his wife Duongchan would fade away one day. The young lovers built the bridge of love when they went to high school in the 1980s. Despite the fact that they went through difficulties, suffered, and lived far away from each other because of war, still their love continued to survive and fly high. They lived together as husband and wife but as an unlawful couple due to disagreement from their parents over economic status and value. Their knot of love lasted till the new Cambodia arrived.

New Cambodia on old land and Cambodian people go from war to wealth. This Southeast Asian nation did not experience many good things after the fall of the killing field in 1979 till the Cold War ended in 1991. The media outlets printed all kinds of stories about corruption, fast food, sex toys confiscated, expensive electronic devices, open sky policy, sex tourism, breast enlargement, penis enlargement, narcotics, sex and crime, land grabbing, demonstrations, money laundering, forest crimes, sex scandals, acid attacks, kidnapping, killing, plastic killers, gambling and casinos, so on and so forth. Cambodians now eat the same fast food as the rest of the world, the same ideas, using the same items, even sharing the same viruses such as HIV/AIDS, SARS, the bird flu (H5N1). All have their parts to play in Cambodia’s new social activities.

The said social issues shaped the love of the young couple whose love has lasted since the 1980s. Their love ended when new Cambodia entered.

This country, which had been devastated by more than 30 years of civil war, is now a new Cambodia on old land. The paddy fields have been replaced by garment factories, the old buildings abandoned after the Khmer Rouge are now replaced by restaurants.

Since the late 2000s, there are a couple of million foreign tourists visiting the Kingdom of Wonder every year, with about 1,000 historic temples nationwide, including the 900-year-old Angkor Wat which is now listed as a World Heritage Site. New Cambodia on old land is mushrooming. Cambodia drops guns and picks up gold. Cambodia is going from war to wealth. The complex situations contributed to Duongchan becoming a crazy and different woman who at the end of the day left Dara, their daughter, and her old mother behind miserable in the poor house. Duongchan, which translated as moon, now gets lost in the middle of the universe, leaving Dara, translated as star, shining alone in the night.

Throughout the 2000s the price of land in Cambodia skyrocketed, largely driven by trade and investments, mainly from China and South Korea. Some villagers sold their farmland, bought expensive cars, contributing to roads congestion and deadly accidents. They also bought expensive status symbols such as necklaces, bracelets, and shiny diamond ear-rings. Dara, who has no land to sell, continued working as a reporter and gets around on an old motorcycle.

For Duongchan, her situation was getting worse. All the chickens had been killed by bird flu. Her daughter got dengue and she took her all the way from the countryside to the children’s hospital, Kantha Bopha, founded by Swiss doctor, Dr Beat Richner, in Phnom Penh. Back home in the village, their house was hit by a storm and the roof made of thatch and the walls made of coconut leaves were blown into the air and landed about two km away from home. Duongchan, after Sakura’s recovery, returned home and was devastated to see the storm had destroyed her house. The whole house was flooded. The plates were broken into pieces by the palm fruits landing in the kitchen. The combined situation made Duongchan unhappy with her life. Duongchan looked frail, felt uneasy, and was ashamed when she saw her neighbour enjoying better conditions. She sometimes got support from the neighbours. The rich guys drove Mercedes Benzes and young girls in sexy clothes drove back and forth in front of her dusty house. Duongchan asked Dara for more support but he could not do it, given he still worked as a reporter for the newspaper with only a small increase in his salary. Dara usually visited his family at the weekend. He drove quite fast as he missed his wife and daughter. Unfortunately, bad luck happened to Dara when a cow and a calf ran quite fast across the path which linked road 2 to the village, making his motorcycle crash into the animals, throwing Dara off and he landed about three meters from his motorcycle. Dara broke his front tooth, his right eye was injured, there were deep cuts in his elbow and left knee, and a lot of grazing from the stones littering the path. His motorcycle was in bad shape. Dara lay on the ground bleeding from his mouth and miserable. He was rescued by villagers who carried him by oxcart to a local hospital. Usually, Duongchan and Sakura expected to see Dara by late Friday afternoon but this time they waited till midnight and still Dara had not shown up.

About 1 AM, villager knocked at Duongchan’s house, telling her, “Dara has been hospitalized after crashing into animals.” Duongchan’s voice broke her voice and she woke up their 10-year-old daughter to come with her as no one else was at home. The mother placed Sakura behind her and cycled all 20 km to the hospital. They reached the hospital and almost could not recognize Dara, given his eye and mouth were swollen as he lay in pain on the rattan bed. Dara’s bad shape was like a wounded soldier who had lost on the battlefield. His journalist jacket was stained with blood. He realised that his wife and daughter had come to see him. Dara opened his eyes in slow motion as he tried to reach out to his daughter and wife who were in tears and holding their hands, saying, “I missed you both. I drove quite fast and I then hit the cow by accident.”

Duongchan cried and said, “We are poor. I am broke. We have problems one after another. What can I do?” Given Dara was the main bread-winner.

To be continued …

Part 2

Dara reached out his hand to pull about $30 from his journalist jacket and hand to his wife. He them released his right hand from his daughter’s.  “I am sorry that I made you both cry. I will be fine, please do not cry. I will drive slower and carefully from now on. Please give me a smile, I am OK” Dara said to his daughter. His eyes were about to close his eyes as he needed rest to regain his energy. The sleepy Sakura tried to smile at her dad and kissed his forehead while she held his hands.

The next morning, Duongchan and Sakura brought Dara porridge with fried fishes and coconut water that would suit Dara as his front tooth was broken. Dara’s situation had forced Sakura to miss her class as she preferred to come with her mom to see her dad in hospital. Two weeks later, Dara’s condition was getting better although he could hardly walk without a walking stick provided by his neighbours.

From that day, the signs of unhappiness came to grow gradually. They ate almost the same food for two weeks. Duongchan had to make porridge for breakfast before she took Sakura to school and then did the housework. Dara could hardly move from one place to another without his walking stick. He was not as strong as before. His wife had to carry the water from the lake. And his wife looked sad and gave him grumpy looks. They had almost nothing but one bag of clean rice, dry fish, and about $275 money his wife had saved.

Dara recovered about one month later. He went back to work. He also started visiting his wife and daughter more regularly. He drove slower and much more carefully than ever. The road he travelled from Phnom Penh to the village - about 120 km  - used to take him about an hour and a half. It took him more than three hours now. Dara regained his physical strength but Duongchan’s love for him diminished and seemed to fade away as time passed.

Sweet love in Cold War had now turned sour and bitter in new Cambodia on old land as Duongchan was stressful. She started to go on nights out with friends, something she never did before. The wealthy guys from Phnom Penh and high-heeled ladies from the coastal town covered her bills. She started to drink and she was involved with drugs. Duongchan who had always drunk palm juice with Dara, now turned to drinking bottles of beer and putting her tears aside as she said goodnight to her 10-year-old daughter sleeping alone in the small dark house.

Dara worked in Phnom Penh so did not know this. Dara understood about the greater social demands of wife, prompting him to study law in the hope that he will get a better job and pay to satisfy his wife. Dara worked full time in the day and went to law classes after sunset. His law class also helped him at work when it came to legal stories, but it did not help his wife to keep the bond of love they built since the 80’s.

On one weekend, Dara visited his wife in the countryside and learned from his mother-in-law that his wife went out after dark with friends and returned home quite late. Dara had quite an argument with her about that. He spotted some drugs hidden under her mat in the bedroom. On the shelf above her bed there were boxes of cosmetics, lotions, perfume, and skin-whitening provided by her wealthy boyfriend from Phnom Penh. High-heel shoes hung on the rattan wall. Red and purple lipsticks were scattered in front of a brand new mirror covered by rosewood standing next to her bed. Her room is full of the smell of perfume. Unfortunately, the daughter’s bedroom is a bit messy.

Dara felt uneasy with seeing items given by strangers to lure his wife. He looked at her and asked “where did you get all these things from?”

Duongchan responded with harsh words, “hey, why? what is wrong with you Mr. jealous journalist? Why are you so serious about the lady items? Why do you look so serious, Mr. journalist? If you did not buy them for me, please do not ask me such questions. Maybe you are a journalist and you like to throw questions at people. I do not think you are throwing questions at the right people at the moment.”

Dara was furious and replied: “That is not the answer. I just asked where did you get these items from?”

The charming and sexy Duongchan hit back, “You know the answer. You can ask yourself by recalling your memories. Remember I asked for things from you, but you said you do not have enough money. There are billions of stars out there but I picked up the wrong one. Dara was furious and hit the mirror but felt so remorseful afterward.

Duongchan replied: “Now, you see, you did not buy the mirror for me bit you were the one who broke it. You are such a coward and a cheap journalist.”

Dara stopped talking and instead turned talking to his mother-in-law who told him, “Your wife today is different from the wife you loved in the Cold War. Duongchan now is different from Duongchan then. Duongchan thinks of dollars. She does not listen to me. I sometimes have to take care of your daughter and cycled all the way back and forth to pick her up from school.”

Dara listened to his mother-in-law attentively.

The mother-in-law continued. “I am getting old… I wanted to spend the remaining part of my life serving as a Buddhist nun living in the temple. You need to look after your wife, making sure you have happiness together.  I might have to leave you all and work and stay in a Buddhist temple as this is part of Cambodia’s way of life when people get old since I do not have a pension.  I want live a quiet life and die peacefully, so I wish you all the best and happiness.”

Duongchan, who was dressed up and was about to leave with her boyfriend said from the other side of the room, “That is enough, really, enough is enough.”

Dara came closer to her and tried to calm her down. Still, she did not listen to Dara anymore. Dara’s words are no longer intriguing her. Their knot of love from the Cold War was beginning to fray.

Duongchan did not pay attention to Dara. Instead, she put on her red and white sexy dress. She pulled out a comb make of wild horn from her bag. She then looked into the mirror and pulled out expensive lipstick, making up her face like she was a model girl from Cambodia’s golden age of the late 1960s and early 1970s.

She can now no longer bear the harsh words flying from her husband’s mouth, prompting her to stare at him and say “could you please shut your mouth. You have said more than enough, Dara”.

To be continued …

Part 3

There was nothing Dara could do, but watch his wife in high-heel shoes and short skirt carrying a red bag with her hair blowing in the wind. She walked straight to a black Mercedes Benz with the guy wearing sunglasses and looking like a Chinese gambler from Macao. He sat and smoked a cigarette while parked about 50 meters from Duongchan’s house, beeping the horn continually to tell Duongchan to come faster, but also annoying the villagers.

That night, Dara slept alone on a bed next to his daughter’s bed. He could not sleep as he thought of Duongchan who did not return home until around 3am. She pushed the rattan front door as she walked in. She smelt of alcohol. She was staggering and then threw up as she tried to take off her shoes. Duongchan struggled to get on the bed so Dara tried to help her to bed but she pushed him away, saying, “I am OK. I am happy to go out. I am happy drinking with people. I do not have to look after chickens and poultry.  I like to make easy money. I need to enjoy my life in the new Cambodia.”

Dara told her to stop talking. But Duongchan was drunk and kept talking alone as if she was with her new boyfriend “… oh my, music band you performed well… karaoke parlour, I want to sing from morning till night… ha, ha, ha… my darling, I want you to drive me in your Mercedes Benz all day long and night… bring me to the beach… to the bed… to the swimming pool… I want to swim… I want to sing, I want to eat… I need dollars my new darling… you name it I want it all. I went through enough suffering and difficulties in the past in the Cold War, so I do not need it anymore. I do not have to share the pain and sorrows of the past any more… I do not know how much longer I will live… I need happiness and a beautiful life and a better lover now.”

Dara again tried to stop her talking. But his drunken wife pushed him away, “do not touch me and stay away from me”. She keeps talking in a low voice and a drunk mood. Her vomit had spilled on her blouse, bra, and hair and was smelling bad.

Dara asked her to stop drinking wine, “I really want you to stick to Khmer tradition. I mean, a woman should not be drinking wine the way you do”.  He hadn’t finished when Duongchan interrupted, “Oh, who says a woman cannot drink wine? Does any schoolbook say that; I do not know.” Dara could not stand her words, and kept asking her to stop. “Stop talking please, the guy you went out with is not here.”

Dara found no more words to respond, but instead walked around the house. He could not sleep that night as he was so worried about his family’s future. Dara was very upset seeing Duongchan’s behaviour. He sat on the rattan chair till sunrise. Dara helped Sakura take a bath and then took her to school on the other side of the village. As he got close to the school, Sakura said, “I will see you after school.” Dara replied in a broken voice, “I am sorry my beloved daughter, I am afraid not, your grandmother will come to pick you up because I have to get back to work in Phnom Penh. As you know it is Monday and I have to drive the 120 km from here to Phnom Penh. I love to bring you to and pick you up from school but I cannot because I have to work to support you and your mother and your grandmother too. On the top of that, I have to take my law class in the evenings after work. When I complete my law degree I will look for a new job with better pay. I will then bring you and your mom to live in Phnom Penh. You will then have the chance to study English and Chinese as well. Please enjoy your classes, I love you.” Dara and his daughter hugged. Dara watched Sakura walk in to school before he sped off to Phnom Penh.

Dara got back to work late. He called his wife, Duongchan, three times. She picked up once. Dara reminded her to pick up Sakura if her mother-in-law could not make it. Duongchan replied in a bad mood, “Mr. journalist, just do your part, and I will do mine.” She then hung up. She did not answer when she received more calls from Dara later in the day. Back at work in Phnom Penh, Dara’s work suffered. He misquoted people and got in troubles many times, but still he did not tell anyone about his personal issues with his wife.

Another weekend arrived. Dara visited his home in the countryside and kept telling Duongchan that, “happiness is enjoying what we have. I am poor in wealth but rich in heart.” His words no longer intrigue Duongchan who responded, “How much longer do we have to go through this kind of happiness? How much longer will it take you be a wealthy guy like others from Phnom Penh? Or do you want to work as journalist and finally be famous like Haing Ngor, the actor in the Killing Fields, who was shot dead in L.A?

Dara was quiet. He could not give any answer to that, instead he said in a gentle low voice to Duongchan, “I do not want anything in this world apart from you, Duongchan. You are everything I have on this beautiful planet. I want nothing else.” Duongchan asked, “What do you like the most in your life then?”

“I like sharing a bed with you,” Dara responded as he was helping Sakura with her homework.

“Ah! You keep saying sharing bed, sharing bed… while other people keep saying sharing billions of riel, billions of riel, and tens of thousands of dollars,” angry Duongchan argued, while washing dishes. 

Then Duongchan turned and starred angrily at her husband, asked: “You seem to not want to be rich?”

“No. I do not have to be rich, all I want is your love and sharing happiness and sadness together and I of course like sharing a bed with you,” Dara responded.

The good journalist Dara continued to try and persuade his wife and cited Shakespeare, “I always feel happy… life if short, so love your life, be happy… and keep smiling… before you hate love.”

Duongchan interrupted: “You are good at quoting people, that is your work as a journalist. But I am not interested in listening to you, Mr. Journalist.”

New Cambodia also shaped people’s value in the village where Duongchan lived. Some migrated to Phnom Penh and worked in the garment industry. Some young girls worked at Karaoke parlours. Other Cambodian businesspeople made money from ugly businesses, such as land grabbing and selling illegal timber. Mobile phones, cars, dollars, even lady’s lotion and cosmetics spread nationwide. At the same time, the living condition of Dara and his wife had not much changed since 2001. Dara still used his old motorcycle. His wife still lived in a small house covered with palm leaves and the wall supported by bamboos sticks and rattan. Duongchan used to have a small farm behind her house but it is now no longer there since a mysterious virus killed all the poultry. When there then 7-year old daughter got dengue, Dara and his wife struggled to get money to pay the medical bills. Dara’s wife felt uneasy with the surrounding environment and ashamed when seeing her neighbors enjoying much better conditions compared to her’s. That brought worry for Dara because he could not make as much money to satisfy his wife’s demands.

To be continued …

Part 4

New Cambodia, new looks, and new ways of living are pushing Dara’s wife’s sweet memories from the Cold War away. Dara bought an audio tape for his wife. He loves emotional, sentimental feelings of how life was in the Cold War days. He loves to listen to Western rock and roll songs by Elvis Presley, John Lennon, and Eric Clapton who are among Dara’s favourite singers. But his wife, Duongchan, now listens to modern Khmer songs by sexy artists who describe how exciting Cambodian women’s lifestyle can be now in the new Cambodia on old land, and it is softly killing an old love.

Cambodia’s new millennium is a wake-up call for Dara that his sweet love is now fading away. Dara tells his heart, “What is happening in this world? I am confused. I thought that when Cambodia’s economy boomed my love would be better but she betrayed my heart instead. New Cambodia is killing my love. My love was so sweet in the Cold War time but it has now turned sour due to the power of money”.

Dara’s worry is greater when he awakes one day and thinks that he will lose Duongchan to another corrupt and wealthy guy from Phnom Penh. His heart knows that the charismatic Duongchan, who was born with natural beauty, big round eyes, brown and soft skin, and a soft-spoken voice, is very attractive to the many city guys who visit their relatives in the same district where Duongchan lives.

The signs of losing love increase as Duongchan keeps asking him for more money to support her new lifestyle like her friends from Phnom Penh. Duongchan no longer seems interested in Dara as much as before. She started to travel with her neighbours and friends from Phnom Penh who owned big and expensive cars. They have bundle of dollars, wear gold, diamonds, and sexy clothes, and all are contributing to take her away from Dara. She travelled to the coastal areas of Kep, Kampot, Sihanoukville, Koh Kong and other places she had never been to before.

Dara noticed that Duongchan’s attitude was getting stranger and stranger. She seems neither wants to pick up calls from Dara nor to talk with him when he is there.

The beautiful Duongchan seems to be moving away from Dara little by little. Another weekend when Dara visited his mother’s home in the countryside, Duongchan was not at home again and left for Kampot province and its beaches. When Dara had called her before leaving Phnom Penh, she replied, “I am sorry Dara. I will not be back home until Monday. Please focus on your job and try to make as much as money as you can and support Sakura.”

Dara learned from his mother in law that Duongchan has the same wealthy boyfriend from Phnom Penh she was with before. The guy has relatives in the same district where Duongchan lives. The guy visited the village and spotted Duongchan when she stopped by her neighbours’ house and was chatting with him. Since then, they guy kept in touch with Duongchan and gradually stole her from Dara.

One weekend in the rainy season of 2005, Dara visited his family in the countryside, Duongchan was not at home. Duongchan’s mother was preparing food for Sakura.

Dara’s heart was pounding hard, and his voice broke after learning that he lost Duongchan to the corrupt and wealthy guy who bought her love with money, clothes, and necklaces.

Dara tried to be calm and drove in the rain to pick up his daughter Sakura from the local primary school. Dara hugged his daughter and pretended to be a happy daddy, saying to Sakura, “You look so great and wonderful, I am so pleased with your class performance.”

Sakura arrived home and asked her daddy to call her mom to join their dinner like before. Dara tried to distract her from her question, “hey, smart daughter, please enjoy your food, your mom will be back very soon.” Duongchan never returned.

Dara cried and wept as if he had lost everything he has in this world. His mother-in-law had tears rolling down her wrinkled cheeks after she saw Dara crying.

Sakura kept asking what had happened.  But neither Dara nor his mother-in-law responded. Dara instead tried to smile through the tears and asked his daughter to keep eating, then to take a bath outside the house under the palm trees where they have a big tank made of cement placed under the palm trees lit by the full moon’s light.

Dara tried to call Duongchan, but he never got through to her. He walked up and down in the house, then he spotted a letter Duongchan wrote and had left on Sakura’s table.

Prasat village, 8th July 2005

Dear ex-husband Dara,

I know you love me as much as my boyfriend does. But you do not have as much as money as my boyfriend does, money, car, and things I have always asked for from you and you kept saying please wait until you will have a new job with better salary along with saying that happiness is enjoying what we have. Please enjoy what you have, Dara, do not worry about me from now on, Dara. All you can do is to take care of our daughter and my mother.

Farewell,

Your ex-partner

Duongchan

Dara became a broken-hearted daddy for couple of years and this affected his journalism work greatly. He always looks sad. Still, he told no one at work of his problems. Being a responsible daddy, Dara fought hard to regain his life as he thinks that Sakura needs him the most, making him be a strong daddy again and handle the heavy burden on his shoulders.

One day in 2005, Dara brought Sakura to see his parents and relatives in Kiriround district to the south of Takeo province near Vietnam’s border. Dara walked hand in hand with Sakura and approached his parents slowly and he and his daughter raised their hands with palms together, a gesture of respect in Khmer tradition.

Dara’s parents asked about his wife. Dara looked to the ground and said, “she left us for a new life.”

The old words of Dara’s mother returned. “What? I told you before I cannot allow you to get engaged to such a girl as Duongchan. I did not know her background and now you see, she left you and your daughter. It is ok, Sakura can live with us and we will take care of her and have her study at the local school here.”

Life went on. Sakura finished her primary school in Tonle village and moved to continue her studies at a high school in Phnom Penh. Dara wanted to bring his 67-year old mother-in-law to live with him, but she gently rejected him since she preferred to live in the same house in countryside to Phnom Penh. Dara later on learned from his mother-in-law and villagers that Duongchan married the same rich boyfriend she loved when she broke away from Dara in 2005.

At one point, Dara took a side trip as he visited his daughter. Dara drove off the national route 2 and visited his mother-in-law in the village. He cried and cried. He could see the old hut standing but not the love he built with Duongchan. Tears welled up in Dara’s eyes and he could not stop the pain in his heart. Dara screamed, “I saved my limbs and my life for my lover Duongchan who has now left me lonely.  How much longer do I have to bear all this pain?

Dara walked slowly as he headed to his motorcycle and kept talking to himself, “I choose to be a loser in the Cold War by not carrying a gun to shoot at Khmer blood on the battlefield. I am now a loser in love as because I cannot make good enough money to satisfy my lover’s demands. How can I survive? Dara left the hut heading to see his daughter who lived with his parents about another 30 km away.

END OF CHAPTER 15